After reading the book Shepherding a Childs Heart, by Tedd Tripp, our first thought was, oh! how we wished we would have had this book when we were raising our children! My wife and I have used this book to counsel and to guide those who have parenting concerns for some time. I put together this study guide some time ago for a class, as well as for counseling homework assignments with great results. This book has proved to be helpful for the pastor, or counselor, as well as the parent, who uses the Bible as well as this resource to parent and help parents. Parenting is not an easy task, it really is a life long endeavor, you will parent your children in some form or fashion for the rest of your life. We do not deal simply with behavioral issues, but rather with the heart from which the behavior comes. This is one reason why this book resonates with me and should with every parent.
We want to reach our children from the heart level, we want them to learn about God from the heart level. The author writes, “A change in behavior that does not stem from a change in heart is not commendable; it is condemnable. Is it not the hypocrisy that Jesus condemned in the Pharisees? In Matthew 15, Jesus denounces the Pharisees who honored Him with their lips while their hearts were far from Him. Jesus censures them as people who wash the outside of the cup while the inside is still unclean. Yet this is what we often do in child-rearing. We demand changed behavior and never address the heart that drives the behavior.” The author also writes, “You must understand, and help your child to understand, how his straying heart has resulted in wrong behavior. How did his heart defect to produce this behavior? In what characteristic ways has his inability or refusal to know, trust, and obey God resulted in actions and speech that are wrong? . . . You must learn to work back from the behavior you see to the heart, exposing heart issues for your children. In short, you must learn to engage them, not just reprove them. Help them see the ways that they are trying to slake their soul’s thirst with that which cannot satisfy. You must help your kids gain a clear focus on the cross of Christ.” I highly recommend this book and can confidently promise if you work on reproducing its teaching you will learn how to shepherd your child’s heart.