Marriage is a unique and profound human relationship. While friendships can be deeply rewarding and parent-child relationships are of utmost importance, no other human bond should receive greater attention than marriage. Likewise, no other relationship can provide the satisfaction and fulfillment that a strong, godly marriage does.
In Genesis, God establishes the unique purpose of marriage:
Genesis 2:24 – “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
The unity of the one-flesh relationship is unparalleled. It is unique because God created it and sustains it. As couples grow in oneness and understanding of one another, they inevitably experience the ebbs and flows of their relationship. Naturally, there are seasons of disunity and frustration as well as harmony and joy. But true marital unity is achieved through the gospel, without the Gospel’s transformational power, it is difficult to achieve oneness in a meaningful sense. They are true partners in their relationship with each other because of their relationship with God. Because of the gospel; if you will allow me to say so, the three are one. God is the center of their relationship, this is the uniqueness of a marriage grounded in the Gospel of Christ. Through the Gospel, they share in something greater than themselves—the Christian life. As a couple, they must commit to growing spiritually together; otherwise, their unity will falter, and the relationship will stagnate.
The Gospel creates a unique unity in marriage because of their unity in Christ. 2 Corinthians 5:17 “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” A husband and wife can share their spiritual lives together as new creations in Christ by relying on His strength to obey, serve, and grow together as individuals in Christ. This allows them to reach a profound and unique spiritual oneness as they share in spiritual growth together.
Their relationship is filtered through this grid of understanding, as they should both desire to grow and change together in Christ. Christ’s life becomes their life together, and Christ’s model of behavior becomes their behavior toward one another. (1 Peter 2:21) They should focus, pursue, and share the spiritual goal of glorifying God in all that they do. 1 Corinthians 10:31 “So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”
Viewing life through the lens of Scripture allows a couple to walk together in the sanctification process (Romans 6–8). The Holy Spirit provides the strength to do what they cannot accomplish on their own as two sinners living together. The Gospel serves as the foundation for understanding each other, settling disagreements, offering forgiveness, and demonstrating God’s kind of love. (Ephesians 4:32) instructs believers to “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” With the Gospel as their common ground, and the Holy Spirit empowering them, they can unite, resisting the flesh and its barriers to harmony. (Galatians 5:16)
A vibrant and deep relationship with Christ enables a couple to model a “one-flesh” relationship truly. The joys of a strong marriage stem from a profound and abiding relationship with Christ.
A couple can genuinely model a “one-flesh” relationship if they have a strong, deep, committed relationship with Christ. A deep and lasting relationship with Christ is the foundation of a healthy marriage. As a couple grows in Christ, they also grow in their marriage. Spiritual growth and marital growth are inseparably linked. If one is not growing in Christ, one is not growing in marriage. Knowing Christ and becoming more like Him enhances and sustains all relationships, but especially marriage.
Commit to growing and changing together in Christ. (2 Peter 3:18) encourages believers to “grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.” Strive to embody the attributes of the Gospel and practice them within your marriage. Exercise repentance and maintain a forgiving spirit. Demonstrate faith in one another—believe in your spouse, trust that they have your best interests at heart, and assume the best about them. Cultivate humility, trust, and loyalty. While the attributes of the Gospel are innumerable, these principles illustrate its impact on marriage.
The Gospel reconciles us to God, establishes a relationship with Him, and sustains that relationship. Keep the Gospel at the center of your marriage, and you will experience unity in your one-flesh relationship.